Yesterday I picked Emma up from a class at 11 a.m. and she proceeded to talk to me for the next 9 and a half hours. And this is not a passive exercise on my part. I can't just pretend to listen --she requires my active participation. (Rob was not home yesterday, the lucky man.) I have read that girl children develop a deep need to communicate, I just never realized it was designed to drive their moms INSANE.
Unfortunately, her girlfriends don't seem to have reached this same level of need --they don't email or e-chat nearly often enough to satisfy her cravings. And of course, this is the downside to having only one child --if I had more than one they'd be slamming their bedroom doors after screaming at one another, and I'd at least have 10 minutes of silence before they both came back to the living room to complain about how horrible the other one was being. Or at least that's what I remember from my childhood with two sisters.
In her morning class there is another girl her age who was in the level 1 class with her last summer. This girl has a facebook page. Emma has wanted a facebook page for a while now, but I've been able to dissuade her because none of her close friends have pages yet. Facebook isn't very interesting if you don't have any FB friends.
I have nothing against Emma getting a FB page, actually. I know there are many people who worry about how FB is basically a marketing system that collects information about its users --and I accept that's true. But that doesn't really bother me terribly --after all, what modern system isn't trying to do that? I'm okay with that being the price of using the internet for all it's wonderfulness (especially shopping, although it's about time they set up a system where I can order my groceries online and have them delivered to my door). My FB profile doesn't include a cell phone number or address. And I'm pretty vigilant about privacy settings --I check them frequently enough to be confident that my level of FB privacy is where I want it to be. And I really enjoy social media --I like how I can feel part of my sister's life, even though we're 8 hours away from each other and see each other infrequently.
Rob, however, falls on the other end of the spectrum. He has a FB page, but he's incredibly paranoid about the internet in general. Well, just paranoid in general, really. So I'll have to have a conversation with him before I can help Emma set up a FB page. I'm confident of my powers of persuasion, although I'm already tired just thinking about trying to reassure him that I will be looking over Emma's shoulder, so to speak, as she begins this new form of communication.
But each minute she's on FB may be a minute she's not talking to me. I can hope anyway.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Relaxing
Last year we put in a flagstone patio --well, we had it put in, the stones are huge to minimize frost-heaving. It's not exactly how we'd like it, but it's a lot better than the muddy grass that used to be outside the sliding doors. And there have been many mornings so far this summer when I've been able to take my breakfast outside, and enjoy listening to the birds and looking at the morning blooms. I want to appreciate having that patio, rather than thinking about how it needs to be changed. I want to remember these mornings, so I can recall them later this summer when it's too hot and humid to enjoy being outside even at 7 a.m., and even later this year, when it's too icy and cold to be outside at all.
I'm a little jealous of people who find living in the moment easy --who manage to enjoy almost every task as they're doing it, rather than looking at it as something to get done. I really have a blessed life, and I need to keep that in mind. It's easier some times than others, but it's one of my goals.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Dental Relief
Monday a week ago, Emma had an appointment for a dental cleaning.
It turned out to be a hell of a day --she had the first meeting of a theater class from 9 to noon, then this appointment at 3 p.m., and then horse-riding lessons at 5:30 p.m. I don't know what I was thinking when I scheduled that day --I needed a head slap over that one. Even worse is the fact that we live 45 minutes away from the class, 30 minutes away from the dentist, and 20 minutes away from the park where the riding lessons are. I figured that staying in town from noon to 3 p.m. was too much time, so we came home for lunch after the class, then went back into town for the cleaning appointment. The plan was to go back home after that, to get her riding clothes, since the park is actually in the opposite direction from the dentist. The dentist didn't get her in until 3:30 p.m., and with the slowest hygienist on the face of the Earth, she was finally done at 4:30 p.m., but we were still wrapping up my chat with the dentist, paperwork, and scheduling an appointment for a filling and two teeth to be pulled by 5 p.m. We finally drove out of the parking lot at 5:10 p.m. We needed food for Emma before riding, and to make both a 30 minute and 20 minute drive in 20 minutes total. I drove too fast and we were only 15 minutes late for the riding lesson --they were incredibly nice about being late, too.
Through all this, Emma was incredibly upset because she now had an appointment for the next Monday (yesterday) to have a cavity filled and two teeth pulled. Nothing freaks kids (and adults!) out like the prospect of dentistry. (As she said, she really likes her dentist, but she wishes dentistry didn't exist.) Riding lessons are expensive (and non-refundable), though, so I insisted. That turned out to be a good thing, because the contact with the horse calmed her down. Animals are so great that way.
So, after a week of anxiety (as opposed to eagerness :-)) yesterday she had the cavity filled and teeth pulled, and was so relieved that she was goofy for an hour afterward. Thank god that week is over!
It turned out to be a hell of a day --she had the first meeting of a theater class from 9 to noon, then this appointment at 3 p.m., and then horse-riding lessons at 5:30 p.m. I don't know what I was thinking when I scheduled that day --I needed a head slap over that one. Even worse is the fact that we live 45 minutes away from the class, 30 minutes away from the dentist, and 20 minutes away from the park where the riding lessons are. I figured that staying in town from noon to 3 p.m. was too much time, so we came home for lunch after the class, then went back into town for the cleaning appointment. The plan was to go back home after that, to get her riding clothes, since the park is actually in the opposite direction from the dentist. The dentist didn't get her in until 3:30 p.m., and with the slowest hygienist on the face of the Earth, she was finally done at 4:30 p.m., but we were still wrapping up my chat with the dentist, paperwork, and scheduling an appointment for a filling and two teeth to be pulled by 5 p.m. We finally drove out of the parking lot at 5:10 p.m. We needed food for Emma before riding, and to make both a 30 minute and 20 minute drive in 20 minutes total. I drove too fast and we were only 15 minutes late for the riding lesson --they were incredibly nice about being late, too.
Through all this, Emma was incredibly upset because she now had an appointment for the next Monday (yesterday) to have a cavity filled and two teeth pulled. Nothing freaks kids (and adults!) out like the prospect of dentistry. (As she said, she really likes her dentist, but she wishes dentistry didn't exist.) Riding lessons are expensive (and non-refundable), though, so I insisted. That turned out to be a good thing, because the contact with the horse calmed her down. Animals are so great that way.
So, after a week of anxiety (as opposed to eagerness :-)) yesterday she had the cavity filled and teeth pulled, and was so relieved that she was goofy for an hour afterward. Thank god that week is over!
Friday, June 17, 2011
Thursday, June 16, 2011
People Watching
Emma has been taking a class this week that meets from 9 a.m. to noon each day. Because the class is being held in a church that is a 45 minute drive from our home, I've been going to Panera each day to work while she's in class. I do this often during the regular semesters, but this is not the same Panera, and it has a different feel, both because of the staff and clientele.
The young woman working the register each morning is a former student of mine. It's always weird to interact with students outside of class, even when they were successful students (it's much worse when they failed your class!). One of the reasons that I like living in a different town from the college is that it minimizes this kind of contact. I didn't recognize the student at first; she said hi and asked me how I was in a way that made it clear she knew me, and that helped me place her. I said something about thinking she looked familiar, and she said she had taken my class and "never studied so hard in my life." My impression was that this was not a good thing.
Yesterday there was an older couple sitting at a table near me. They were both dressed in a way I'd describe as preppy --he had a sweater over a polo shirt, and the collar of his polo shirt was intentionally up; she had on a blouse with a sweater draped over her shoulders. They were wearing white and pastels, and I swear the color of their shirts matched. Something about their clothes and attitude projected money. I don't actually care how people dress in general, although preppy is not my style, but what was really striking was how unhappy they seemed. They sat across from each other, each with a coffee mug, and never said a word to each other. They didn't really even look at each other. It was almost as if they were there just to be seen --just a very weird vibe.
Today there is a guy sitting near me who continues to have very loud cell phone conversations. It's obvious that this is his office --he didn't even order anything to eat or drink. When he's not on the phone, he's on his computer, which thankfully is much quieter. I use Panera as my office too, but I try to keep my business to myself (for instance, I don't sing along to the music I'm listening to, although I might bop my head around, very quietly). I suppose I might be in the minority in this, but I just think it's so rude to have loud phone conversations in public places. People seem to speak at higher decibels when they're on the phone than when they're just conversing with each other face to face. Couples having conversations around me are just a distant buzz, but I am now aware that the unshaven guy in the white undershirt at the next table has a customer whose shop-vac won't work in a certain situation, and that if someone else doesn't hear from him before Monday, the delivery will be on schedule. And I have earbuds in, trying to get Justin Townes Earle to drown out the phone conversations!
Emma has class again tomorrow, but I won't be here. Tomorrow is a big day --after I drop her off, I go to the orthodontist to get my braces off! I'm so excited at the prospect of being able to eat again without having to spend hours extracting food from my teeth. And I can have popcorn again! Oh joy!
The young woman working the register each morning is a former student of mine. It's always weird to interact with students outside of class, even when they were successful students (it's much worse when they failed your class!). One of the reasons that I like living in a different town from the college is that it minimizes this kind of contact. I didn't recognize the student at first; she said hi and asked me how I was in a way that made it clear she knew me, and that helped me place her. I said something about thinking she looked familiar, and she said she had taken my class and "never studied so hard in my life." My impression was that this was not a good thing.
Yesterday there was an older couple sitting at a table near me. They were both dressed in a way I'd describe as preppy --he had a sweater over a polo shirt, and the collar of his polo shirt was intentionally up; she had on a blouse with a sweater draped over her shoulders. They were wearing white and pastels, and I swear the color of their shirts matched. Something about their clothes and attitude projected money. I don't actually care how people dress in general, although preppy is not my style, but what was really striking was how unhappy they seemed. They sat across from each other, each with a coffee mug, and never said a word to each other. They didn't really even look at each other. It was almost as if they were there just to be seen --just a very weird vibe.
Today there is a guy sitting near me who continues to have very loud cell phone conversations. It's obvious that this is his office --he didn't even order anything to eat or drink. When he's not on the phone, he's on his computer, which thankfully is much quieter. I use Panera as my office too, but I try to keep my business to myself (for instance, I don't sing along to the music I'm listening to, although I might bop my head around, very quietly). I suppose I might be in the minority in this, but I just think it's so rude to have loud phone conversations in public places. People seem to speak at higher decibels when they're on the phone than when they're just conversing with each other face to face. Couples having conversations around me are just a distant buzz, but I am now aware that the unshaven guy in the white undershirt at the next table has a customer whose shop-vac won't work in a certain situation, and that if someone else doesn't hear from him before Monday, the delivery will be on schedule. And I have earbuds in, trying to get Justin Townes Earle to drown out the phone conversations!
Emma has class again tomorrow, but I won't be here. Tomorrow is a big day --after I drop her off, I go to the orthodontist to get my braces off! I'm so excited at the prospect of being able to eat again without having to spend hours extracting food from my teeth. And I can have popcorn again! Oh joy!
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Energy Boosts and Energy Drains
On Tuesday I had to go in to campus to attend a webinar with a couple of other faculty. It was so refreshing to have adult conversations about teaching! I really miss that during the summer. I love my job. I came home excited about my new project and energized. Now I just need to find some time when I can actually concentrate on doing the prep work.
Today was lots of work. First shopping, which I hate with a passion. We had to go to Lowe's to get a new faucet for the kitchen sink. We have hard water, and we go through certain things quickly because of that. I would have been fine with Rob picking one out, but he always thinks I need to have input on these things --I could care less what the faucet looks like, as long as it works.
Next was Target, which they have completely rearranged! I hate it when they do that. I sent Rob and Emma off to look for flip-flops again, and tried to find the various face and body wash products I use. As I was trying to find a toner, two women who knew each other were chatting, and one said "I need to find body wash --I don't know where they put it." Luckily I had just found it and could direct her, and we all three commiserated for a while on how annoying it is when stores rearrange to try to get us to make more impulse buys.
This afternoon we had to vacuum the pool and clean the filter. It's not complex, really, now that we know what we're doing and have a system down, but it's never the best job in 95 degrees. I had no energy today and it was no surprise that I started my period this evening --I could tell that my lack of energy was centered in my abdomen. It's almost like there's an energy drain there just before I start. Sorry if that's too much information! This made the pool chores more chore-like, but afterward I relaxed for a bit on a floaty. We had to buy a new solar cover this season, and put it on for the first time this afternoon after swimming --we're supposed to have some very nice, sleep-with-the-windows-open weather, but we want to maintain the 85 degrees we've managed to get in the water. We also put all the pool toys in the shed --thank goodness because we have had the most incredible winds this evening! We would have had a turtle and dolphin flying overhead if we hadn't locked them safely away. As it was I had to run outside to get the towels and swimsuits from the porch railing as they were taking flight.
It still hasn't rained though. I want that rain to move just slightly south, so I don't have to spend all day tomorrow dragging a sprinkler around. My garden is parched, and there is only so much you can do with watering cans.
Today was lots of work. First shopping, which I hate with a passion. We had to go to Lowe's to get a new faucet for the kitchen sink. We have hard water, and we go through certain things quickly because of that. I would have been fine with Rob picking one out, but he always thinks I need to have input on these things --I could care less what the faucet looks like, as long as it works.
Next was Target, which they have completely rearranged! I hate it when they do that. I sent Rob and Emma off to look for flip-flops again, and tried to find the various face and body wash products I use. As I was trying to find a toner, two women who knew each other were chatting, and one said "I need to find body wash --I don't know where they put it." Luckily I had just found it and could direct her, and we all three commiserated for a while on how annoying it is when stores rearrange to try to get us to make more impulse buys.
This afternoon we had to vacuum the pool and clean the filter. It's not complex, really, now that we know what we're doing and have a system down, but it's never the best job in 95 degrees. I had no energy today and it was no surprise that I started my period this evening --I could tell that my lack of energy was centered in my abdomen. It's almost like there's an energy drain there just before I start. Sorry if that's too much information! This made the pool chores more chore-like, but afterward I relaxed for a bit on a floaty. We had to buy a new solar cover this season, and put it on for the first time this afternoon after swimming --we're supposed to have some very nice, sleep-with-the-windows-open weather, but we want to maintain the 85 degrees we've managed to get in the water. We also put all the pool toys in the shed --thank goodness because we have had the most incredible winds this evening! We would have had a turtle and dolphin flying overhead if we hadn't locked them safely away. As it was I had to run outside to get the towels and swimsuits from the porch railing as they were taking flight.
It still hasn't rained though. I want that rain to move just slightly south, so I don't have to spend all day tomorrow dragging a sprinkler around. My garden is parched, and there is only so much you can do with watering cans.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Peace . . .
Here is my day: I wake up without an alarm, feeling refreshed. I go downstairs in pj's and turn on the espresso machine. I make myself a black-cherry smoothie and sit out on the patio to drink it. No one interupts me, no one asks what they can have for breakfast when they know very well what all the options are, and I don't have to make anyone else's breakfast. After contemplating the garden and listening to bird song while slurping my smoothie, I make a cappuccino. Taking that to the couch, I check FB, read blog posts and check for messages from students in the online class I'm teaching. I answer emails. I do all this without any unnecessary questions or inane comments. Then, I stretch out on the couch and spend some time reading . . . . but enough of fantasy, huh?
Emma wants a kitten, so we're getting her a gold fish.
We have a fabulous 14 year old cat. She loves people, but she has a strong dislike for other cats. We tried once before. So, until Gwen's time has passed, no more cats for us. Today at the pet store Emma and I got talked into a smallish tank with a simple filter so that we --oops! I mean she-- won't have to clean the fish bowl every other day. After the water has "conditioned" overnight, we'll get the fish tomorrow. I was hoping she'd go for a betta, since they're cleaner, but no, she wants a goldfish because it will better match her yellow room.
The pool is fully opened now. Emma and Rob were in to position the ladder yesterday, in 74 degree water. Not for me! I like water temps in the 90's :-) Emma's friend A will be coming over tomorrow afternoon to try out the new floaty-boat in the pool. Although the infinite number of questions lately is driving me nuts, today did feel a bit more relaxed and summer-ish. Now I just need to go grade a set of discussion questions . . .
Emma wants a kitten, so we're getting her a gold fish.
We have a fabulous 14 year old cat. She loves people, but she has a strong dislike for other cats. We tried once before. So, until Gwen's time has passed, no more cats for us. Today at the pet store Emma and I got talked into a smallish tank with a simple filter so that we --oops! I mean she-- won't have to clean the fish bowl every other day. After the water has "conditioned" overnight, we'll get the fish tomorrow. I was hoping she'd go for a betta, since they're cleaner, but no, she wants a goldfish because it will better match her yellow room.
The pool is fully opened now. Emma and Rob were in to position the ladder yesterday, in 74 degree water. Not for me! I like water temps in the 90's :-) Emma's friend A will be coming over tomorrow afternoon to try out the new floaty-boat in the pool. Although the infinite number of questions lately is driving me nuts, today did feel a bit more relaxed and summer-ish. Now I just need to go grade a set of discussion questions . . .
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Too Much! Too Much! I give up.
Just before I came down to write this post, I was upstairs, lying naked except for undies across the end of our bed, with the ceiling fan blowing on me. I was trying hard to cool down after showering the mosquito larvae off.
The day didn't start out bad --I had a hair-cut appointment mid-morning, so I decided I'd take Emma to Target first, in order to get her a new pair of flip-flops (she'd outgrown last year's pair and they were hurting her feet). No luck at Target . . . or at Kohls, or the grocery store. We finally found some at Walmart. Way too much shopping for me. Plus, the entire time we were gone --from about 8:30 a.m. till 11 a.m., Emma chattered. A million questions I couldn't answer and don't really care about. It's reminiscent of when she was two, and the "why?'s" went on to infinity.
After lunch we took the winter cover off our pool. We were stupid when we bought our pool --30 feet round sounded so good. I mean, if you're going to get a pool, you might as well get one you can swim in, right? Wrong. Dealing with the winter and solar covers is pure hell. They are big, unwieldy, and heavy. We do actually get better at it year after year, but it is an enormous job.
After hours of draining water off the cover, Rob loosened the wire, Emma held onto the far side so it wouldn't go in the pool, and he and I tried to fold it over, trapping the remaining water in a puddle on the far side. In theory this is great, but in practice we're dealing with slippery black plastic covered in red algae and mosquito larvae. So, in a moment or so, our arms and shirts were covered with algae and mosquito larvae too. Just yuck. It's really disconcerting to look down at your arm and see lots of squirming larvae, but not be able to do anything about it because both hands are required to hold the folded cover up so that Rob can stick the shop-vac hose down into the remaining water. Finally, after emptying the shop-vac four times, we had reduced the amount of water enough for me to be able to help heave it over the side.
Then we had to clean the cover. This involves spraying with water, while trying to hold up one side and drain the dirty water off the far side. Again, I think this would be significantly easier if the pool cover wasn't so enormous. By the time we got that done, spread it out, folded it multiple times, and got it on a shelf in the pool shed, the muscles in my arms (not strong to begin with) had turned to jello, and I was so hot that my face was bright red. We started the job around 2 p.m. and finished around 5 p.m. We're ordering pizza for dinner tonight. I might just have a large glass of wine as my dinner. I told Rob I don't want to do that again for a year.
The day didn't start out bad --I had a hair-cut appointment mid-morning, so I decided I'd take Emma to Target first, in order to get her a new pair of flip-flops (she'd outgrown last year's pair and they were hurting her feet). No luck at Target . . . or at Kohls, or the grocery store. We finally found some at Walmart. Way too much shopping for me. Plus, the entire time we were gone --from about 8:30 a.m. till 11 a.m., Emma chattered. A million questions I couldn't answer and don't really care about. It's reminiscent of when she was two, and the "why?'s" went on to infinity.
After lunch we took the winter cover off our pool. We were stupid when we bought our pool --30 feet round sounded so good. I mean, if you're going to get a pool, you might as well get one you can swim in, right? Wrong. Dealing with the winter and solar covers is pure hell. They are big, unwieldy, and heavy. We do actually get better at it year after year, but it is an enormous job.
After hours of draining water off the cover, Rob loosened the wire, Emma held onto the far side so it wouldn't go in the pool, and he and I tried to fold it over, trapping the remaining water in a puddle on the far side. In theory this is great, but in practice we're dealing with slippery black plastic covered in red algae and mosquito larvae. So, in a moment or so, our arms and shirts were covered with algae and mosquito larvae too. Just yuck. It's really disconcerting to look down at your arm and see lots of squirming larvae, but not be able to do anything about it because both hands are required to hold the folded cover up so that Rob can stick the shop-vac hose down into the remaining water. Finally, after emptying the shop-vac four times, we had reduced the amount of water enough for me to be able to help heave it over the side.
Then we had to clean the cover. This involves spraying with water, while trying to hold up one side and drain the dirty water off the far side. Again, I think this would be significantly easier if the pool cover wasn't so enormous. By the time we got that done, spread it out, folded it multiple times, and got it on a shelf in the pool shed, the muscles in my arms (not strong to begin with) had turned to jello, and I was so hot that my face was bright red. We started the job around 2 p.m. and finished around 5 p.m. We're ordering pizza for dinner tonight. I might just have a large glass of wine as my dinner. I told Rob I don't want to do that again for a year.
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